The past five years of my life have been much more than a journey. It's been more of a climb then a plummet... a range of emotions and events that I wouldn't wish on anyone but here I am still in one piece feeling like I've been glued back together - parts are missing and now it's time to find them and put me back together again. .
When you get to the point in life where you begin to question the reason for all of the "lessons" and "tests" you've been given, we all (at some point or another) arrive at the feeling of "no more lessons, I want it to be break time." Are you sensing where I'm going with this? Oh yes, I'm there.
I'm holding my head high but feel like that's just about the way it sounds - I'm holding my head up but more times than not, my fragile shoulders are shaking under the weight. I'm constantly remided of something my twin brother use to say when he was still of this earth "It's almost impossbile for me to try to understand what's going on in my life right now but I'll take it because I don't know how anyone else could without believing or God. No matter what, HE will take it when I can't."
As I write this, part of me is concerned who will see it and how it sounds now or will sound sound in a year from now. Will someone think I'm on the edge and wonder why I'm putting myself out in the open this way? But that's part of where I am... this journey.
Few people really know me. For that matter, I guess most of the time I don't even know myself but I'm tired and want to feel again. So here it goes as I take a deep breath and ask for HIS help.
Let the journey begin!
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